I Used To Love Crickets

Crickets used to remind me of hot summer vacations in the midwest, and I loved them. The Crickets were even one of my favorite bands. But dude, moving to Long Island has totally changed my perspective, mostly because the noise is giving me a headache that won't go away.

For the last five or six weeks, the crickets have been freaking unstoppable. They are calling to their chirpy little lovers everywhere in my house. Under my dishwasher. Under my refrigerator. Under my oven. Behind my desk. And just generally in my dining room, where they just love the acoustics, and where they sometimes gather in groups of two or three, in what I can only imagine are little cricket orgies.

It's been great for sending me to bed early. There is no way I can stand the noise until Mad Men is over, for example. I will shoot myself in the head if I have to listen to it for another two hours. I don't really think it's wise for me to try to go to bed at 8:30, but I will certainly go upstairs and read or something and pray that I can drown the little beasts out. Last night one holed up under the dishwasher and at 8:00 I couldn't take it any more. I loaded the dishwasher and turned it on and then went upstairs to try to empty the noise out of my head.

In the past, when I saw a cricket, I would try to encourage it to leave, because I'm seeing a nice human who has Views about bug killing (he doesn't do it--there's a designated glass in my kitchen and a designated post card and they are the designated bug-catching equipment and the bugs get ferried kindly outside). But the gloves are off. If I get off work before Home Depot closes tomorrow, steps will be taken.

In the meantime....chirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirp
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chirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirp
chirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirp
chirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirp
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chirpchirpchirpchirpchirpchirp.