Whatever You Do, DON'T Follow My Lead

I can pick a good technology. But don't buy it when I do.

I bought an iPod right before they came out with a new, smaller iPod. And also, coincidentally, right before Mac decided to start giving my employer a massive discount.

I also recently bought an HD Tivo. It's an awesome Tivo, and I love it. It's quiet (my old one was stroppy and noisy), it's full of delicious programming all the time. It records more than one thing. It's super. But when I bought it, you couldn't get lifetime service. If I bought it two months later (i.e., Right Now) I'd have lifetime service for only a little more than I paid for three years.

Tivo is great at many things, but customer service isn't one of them. They've essentially farmed out most of their customer service to their many customers (the discussion boards--both on their website and off--are your best bet if you ever have an issue). If you ever have a customer service issue, have a sudoku puzzle or two handy--it took them 15 minutes to get a supervisor to explain to me (none too helpfully) that I'm just shit out of luck on the lifetime service.

Apparently lifetime service is either for people who already have a Tivo (gee, I thought that was definitely me--this is the second Tivo I've purchased and the fourth Tivo I've owned) or for people who don't already have a Tivo (obviously not me). I fall between the cracks, as someone whose old Tivo wasn't old enough (not born before Jan 1 2000) and whose new Tivo is not new enough. I can't transfer or purchase lifetime service without dropping $700 for another Tivo that I don't need.

I like their service, and I don't mind paying for it, but I do mind being fined for eternity for buying something a month early (and, as bonus, being fined for being a loyal customer). He did point out, somewhat more substantially, that I didn't buy the "Series 3." I bought the "stripped-down, economy version"--a Series 3 with exactly 3 things missing:

• THX certification (oh so useful in my 400-square-foot apartment)
• backlit remote
• a sign telling me what it's recording now

For these paltry advantages, they will charge you a whopping amount of money (less now, but at the time I bought it, $200). Since I'm not drooly enough to plonk down $200, apparently I deserve to buy my Tivo service a la carte forever.

So, yeah. Buy what I buy. But buy it at some other time. I'd tell you when, but I obviously don't know, or I'd be buying it then, too.