Today I went to a discussion with a senior VP where he invites a bunch of employees into a room and asks them if they're happy. I left with the impression that everyone is happy except me.
Don't get me wrong. I have a job, and it pays well and provides me with health care. I work for a good company, and I have worked for much worse. But after the layoffs that hit our department in January or February, we are overwhelmed. Managers (not my manager, but the guys above him) keep taking on more work, and they keep giving it to us. And we keep trying to do it, but we fell behind months ago and have no hope of catching up. There's no effort to prioritize. A colleague recently asked a manager to prioritize the 8 projects he'd been given, and the response was, "Well, it all has to get done." That's pretty typical these days. Which is why I'm at work at 11 at night.
But in this room everyone was happy and enthusiastic. They all felt like they had work life balance. I was just sitting there and going, hey, I want to work where they work. Because I'm pulling 12 and 14 hour days. This right here? This is a 15 hour day. I don't do enthusiasm any more. If you've seen the Lucy episode where she's got the conveyor belt full of candy, that's pretty much where I'm at. My bra is full of candy. My hat is full of candy. I don't have anywhere left to put the candy. And then this bright young cheerleadery chickie from another area of IT was all, "What can IT do for you, Mr. Senior VP?" You know, like when the supervisor comes out to survey Lucy and Ethel's work and says, "speed 'er up!" I am having trouble acknowledging the divine in that cheerleadery chickie, let me tell you.
I should have said something--not just because it's the right thing to do, but because I wouldn't now be tempted to just e-mail the senior VP and say, "I'm at work, and I'm not happy." But then you're the "negative" person in the room full of cheery, sunny, shiny, happy people. Which is never a good role.
Sorry, gang. I'm not an effing cheerleader. I'm at work at 11:18, and I'm not happy.